Monday 30 September 2013

A day in the life of....

6:30 am milk time...

Awake till 9:00 when maalishwalli does maalish. Fresh diaper!

9:45 milk time ....

10:15 sleep for ... Twenty minutes 

11:30 fruits.. Bananas papayas and what not!

12:00 change diaper

1:00 milk time 

3:00 food time daal or khichdi 

4:30 diaper change

5:00 milk time!

7:30 food time.. Daliya or mashed up vegetables 

9:00 diaper change!!

9:45 milk time

11:00 also sometimes milk time!

11:45 sleep... After fighting and fighting and fighting it!

2:30 stir in bed...

4:30 stir in bed...

6:30 milk time!!!


Tuesday 24 September 2013

Aaaarggghhh!!

Working with a baby is tough...

Working with a baby with family support... Still tough. 

Some things just have to be you... When he is super sleepy but refuses to sleep... Seriously only a mom's arms and soft whispering can knock him out...

When he has to eat his solids but is throwing a fit, only a mum can be firm and yet gentle at the same time. 

Sometimes I come back from a long day at work and he looks at me.. Takes a second or two to register and then out come the pout and frown combo... The deadly "where have you been" eyes that just melt your heart and make you feel oh so so guilty. 

Sometimes I need to finish a presentation and all he wants to do is roll around in bed with me... He won't play on his own he won't eat and sleep. And if he is sleepy, he will fight it till the very very end.. Which usually ends my work time as well! 

Sometimes I just get so tired... Because work isn't really all on a roll, things are still picking up and I need to spread the word around, you know "need one to show the others" kind of a thing... How I sometimes regret not being serious about what I love so much.... Being a free spirited "I can do everything girl" sure has made a couple of dents in the work graph....

I want to work... As much for myself as to have Sid understand work ethics, understand that it's not just daddy who works but mommy too. That every day has to be disciplined and planned. 

But planning a day is not easy at all. Something or another will come up... A doctors appointment, the maalishwalli will be late and the whole morning will go for a toss, or some days when there isn't much to do but you know you have to do something (if you know what I mean?!!!) and he looks at you with that super cute face, and you have to be strong enough to say" no I have to work!" 

Aaarrrggghhh!! 

Also how much can you expect your in laws to do? I mean mine are great, they have him from morning eight till afternoon around three... Which gives me plenty of time to work, till that massive guilt takes over me... 

"What must they think of me... Leaving my little baby all day?" ( which actually they never say but my over imaginative mind is enough to make me feel horrible!!) 

And there goes my day in trying to spend time with Sid in the middle if work because I have felt guilty. 

Guilt is seriously one the the most stupid emotions. 

Tough tough tough!!!! But I guess I just have to push through it. The initial phase is tough, once work becomes constant maybe things will be easier... Fingers crossed!!! 


Saturday 21 September 2013

Things for the new baby!

When I found out I was pregnant, well after the first three months of throwing up, all I wanted to do was to buy stuff for the baby!!! 

Now I'm not superstitious or anything, but maybe because of the last experience I decided to wait till seven months were up before going crazy shopping!!

But all thru I kept making my lists!!! Things I needed for the hospital, things I need at home. His clothes, his diapers, bibs, it's never ending!!

So for the house I knew exactly what all I wanted. 

Two major things I was sure of were his cot and his changing table/ wardrobe. 

I was a hundred percent sure I wanted a cot. Everyone tried talking me out of it... "What's the point? He will toh sleep with you only till he is two. It's a waste of money, by the time he is ready to sleep on his own he will want a proper bed and his own room!!! 

But I was sure. 

And today I'm glad. Even though he did sleep with me mostly through the first three months, I started putting him in his bed for his short naps from the second month end. And starting the third month, he did all his sleeping there. And he loves it. He understands that's his space. Here he happily goes around in circles all thru the night without disturbing anyone. 

In fact in between when he wasn't well, I put him in bed with me, and got punched and kicked so bad (!!!!!) I blessed his cot even more!!! 

The changing table as well... Everyone said what a western concept, we simply put rubber sheets or plastic sheets on our bed and changed the babies. I have always had a weak lower back and having read that post pregnancy the lower back gets even more jacked... It really didn't make any sense to me to put it thru any more stress. Also in the initial months he is peeing and pottuing every like ten minutes... Can you imagine bending over each time to change him......? 

So I made a chest of drawers, with a big counter to fit the baby on. It worked like a charm. I had everything I needed to change him around me, his cloth nappies in the first drawer, wipes on the counter, it was easy peasy! And my back was saved from unnecessary pain. 

In fact everyone who changed him on the counter, thanked me for it!! 

The only things I would change about it are, that I wish the counter was bigger, at five months he had outgrown the width, and I wish I had some kind of a frame on two sides that could hold him in, he was and still is a super wriggly baby. 

And having his own wardrobe is a great way to have all his things in one space. There are very few clothes and toys initially so a basic size of drawers was good. That too I customized to have small section in the first draw to fit mittens and socks and little bibs etc and then bigger ones in the one below, for the rompers and toys and blankets and towels etc. An organised space really helps at three in the morning!!!

Other than these major things you will need: 

1. Cloth nappies and plastic cover nappies for the first three months. I was very sure I didnt want to use pampers to begin with. But when my poor bumling started crying at night more because he had wet his diaper than for food, I started using a pamper only at nights. 

2. Wipes. I know Johnson and Johnson has had some issues lately, but I tried Himalaya wipes and didn't like them. 

3. Mulmuls to wrap him up in. Also some flannels and a thick blanket since he was a winter end baby. 

4. Initially you will just sponge bathe him. So you'll need only a towel, no need to buy the bath tub or any soaps and shampoos. That all can come under your two month shopping list. 

5. Since the weather was still cold when he was born, I bought vests to wear under his rompers, pyjama suits, lots of socks. Mittens were a waste on him because he was too small and they would just slip off him!!! I had lots of little caps to cover his head. Also full body suits that cover his feet and hands for the night is super important. 

6. I knew he was still too small but I liked the idea of having toys for him from the beginning. Luckily my best friend had loaded me up with some super adorable toys! I started showing him a rattle and moving it left to right from the second month on. He loved it!!!! 

7. Get a nail cutter, the scissors actually are better. This little things nails grow like insanely!! And they tend to scratch their faces a lot. If mittens fit your bumling consider yourself super lucky!! It's scary the first time you cut his nails, those tiny little fingers oh god!!! But just hold his hand firmly and take a deep breath and go for it!!! 

8. Bibs.... Babies are messy eaters!! 

9. Get some plastic sheets for the bed. Even if he has his plastic diaper on, babies pee has a tendency to get out!!! Also here I would like to let all new mommies to understand that pee and pottu are going to be something you will be handling a lot, so the sooner you get used to a stream of pee pouring onto your clothes or realising mid meal that his pottu has reached your lap (yes it happens... Stop saying eeeewwww!!!)  the better it will be for you!!! 

10. A night lamp and something which plays some soothing music is of great help. I remember when I was preggie Aadi would play me this really nice music at night to make me and the baby sleep. So when he was born we would play it for him and it would work!! I wonder if he remembered the music!!! 

So that's about it for the first month or two at least. Then depending on when you want to introduce the bottle and start shampooing his little head you can buy everything else. But this little list should be good enough to get you started! 



Tuesday 17 September 2013

Mommyhood!

The blessing and pains of motherhood can only be understood by mothers. 

How much your back hurts in the ninth month, how exhausting morning sicknesses can be, how you crave for fun foods! 

How your heart breaks when you don't have enough milk in your breasts for your baby, how to swaddle the little one right so he sleeps for those precious two hours! 

When to start top feed, which one, how much? Started weaning? Which fruits to give ... What daal to begin with? What veggies cause gas?

For every step of the way, from the day I got preggie till today, I have always connected with some mom or another for advice, to just pour out all my anxieties on or to simply talk about the joys of having a bumling!! 

I have mommy friends I can call up anytime... Each with a baby at a different stage. Some are old school friends, some are new friends, some are best friends!!! Most are girls I have grown up with and the fact that we all have babies is a strange feeling!!!

Then I have baby centre.... Which is such a great platform especially during pregnancy.... Type any question and you get a billion replies... From silly things like how small is the baby in your tummy to what to do if you have an std during pregnancy... Someone is asking the questions that are in your head!

Post pregnancy I have joined the first moms club... Which has been a great place to understand and to learn new things about the baby. How to fix a common cold to what to look for in play schools... To how to deal with postpartum depression.... To how to deal with intrusive family members!! 

And I've recently met a group in Jaipur of new moms, we were all in Lamaze class together... And it was so much fun.. Because all of us being locals, we can meet often with and without the babies. All are kids are around the same age, so all problems of breast feeding weaning off new teeth, babies rolling over, everything will come together so we can discuss everything and help each other out. Play dates will be easier too!!

I've realised no one can give you advice like a mommy can. Our mommies and mom in laws are a great help, but with so many things changing and the fact that its been 30 odd years for them since they had babies, there is only so much they can help with (though both my mum and Ma in law were fantastic help in the first few months of bumling) 

A new mom however, someone who has just gone thru the experience herself, can help you deal with things much better. 

Just knowing you're not the only one who's hair is falling so much you think you'll need a wig (!!) makes you sleep better!! 


Photo Studio 10


This ain't fooling no one!!! 

Sunday 15 September 2013

Circus at feeding time!!

At six months plus, feeding time gets really tough,mommys and mommys-to-be beware!!!

You are going to be trying out new things everyday, steamed apples, potato and pea mash, pumpkin cooked with some tadka!

Some things he will love and eat up with no fuss, but some.... Oh my god!! The drama that will unfold the days he is not liking something it is unbelievable!! 

He will stuff his mouth with food and then spit it out, he will squirm in his chair, he will twist his neck in directions you didn't think were possible...!! 

And mind you it's not a one man job... You need a circus to feed a six month old... So one person will sing and dance and tell him stories... One will make him watch videos on your phone...one will feed... One will hold his arms down!!! 

There will be food starting from his forehead to his toes!!! And when he sneezes in between his meal,there will be food starting from your forehead to your toes as well!!! 

Exasperated is an emotion you will feel very familiar with!!!! 

And just when you are close to loosing it... To giving up on the whole feeding process....  That smile will come... That naughty little side smile on his face that will make you shrug, shake your head and start all over again... With a smile on your face!!! 




Tuesday 10 September 2013

So much like Aadi!

The day I saw my bumling in a 3D sonography... I saw that nose and I knew it was my nose! My pudgy pakoda nose!!!

But I had no idea how much like Aadi he would be! It's strange... Out of ten people nine will say that he is the splitting image of his dad, a carbon copy! 

And he is... The features at first glance are just identical... The same small lips, the eyes, the hair...!! 

It's so adorable! 

In fact Ma found a picture of Aadi as a baby, and he looked so much like Sid that when I sent it to mum and Akshai they were confused for a second!


in this picture especially he is little Sid.... don't you think?!!!


This one too... except maybe the forehead....


Here too he looks just like Sid.... its amazing the similarity!!!

However disappointed I may be (not!!!) that he doesn't look like me.... well I know he's going to grow up to be a really handsome boy!!! ha ha!!

What is really funny though, is once Aadi and I were watching this really dumb movie about super hero kids in some super hero school.... and the main villain has this gun which when she shoots at people they turn into babies!! super dumb I know!!

except that I always told Aadi how I would love that gun, so when I felt insane love for him I could just shoot him, make him into a little baby and hold him in my arms!!!!

Looks like I got it!!!


More than the looks, i'm sure he'll be just like his daddy as a person.... warm, gentle, sweet, sexy, funny, cocky and still nice... oh so nice!!!

Photo Studio 09

He ha ha ha ha ha ha!!! 

Friday 6 September 2013

So exhausted....

Some days are just plain exhausting...

The last two weeks for me have been mad to say the least. 

From hand making invites to planning and setting up a two day exhibition, to being there selling for two days.. Then to pack up...

All along with Sid's diaper changing, feeds, sleeping routines.... Even though I had a lot of help from home... It was still mad...

I knew working and looking after the baby would be tough... But what I didn't count on was everyone including me to fall sick :( that part was just super tough. 

Most often, what I realised was that it wasn't always just the chores that would get difficult, it was entertaining him... Having that up beat fun energy to get him to smile, or to simply engage him in a toy... Then feeding him... That takes a whole lot of energy too... By the last few bites he is done.. He'll literally start jumping off the bouncer when he doesn't want no more... Keeping him there and getting him to finish is crazy... I have to sing or make funny sounds or play lenka on Aadi's phone... 

But more than anything... Putting him to sleep on days that I'm tired are just like getting to the edge of the cliff... And if for any reason he decides to start crying in my ear... Well that's the thing to drive me off the cliff!!! 

Oh my god.... In my head I just want to run away.... And just keep running..... 

Then I calm down... Which calms him down... Then I sing softly... Which actually calms me down further... He starts putting his head on my shoulder... His eyes droop.. And finally he passes out.. And I lay him down on his bed.. Take a deep breath, tell him I love him... 

And go... To clean my room, put away my clothes, write my blog.... Still a hundred things to do... So exhausted.... 

But that's life... And it's a choice I have made... So I gotta keep on going!! 



Tuesday 3 September 2013

Photo Studio 08


And there's nothing you can do about it!! 

At six months...

Ten things I love about bumling!

Waking up to him in bed... Just seeing him rolling in bed next to you is such a surreal but amazing feeling!!!

Watching him play alone with his bed mobile...so sweet and quiet! 

The way he knocks out mid meal... His eyes just start drooping!! I have to keep knocking on his milk bottle to get him to finish!!

The way he jumps out of his skin when someone sneezes or coughs loudly!! His whole tiny body shakes and his eyes become super round!!! 

When he shakes his rattle and gets excited about it!

When I check if he's hungry and i put my finger in his mouth, if he is hungry the way he starts biting my finger like a little piranha!!!!

The adorable "where did you leave me and go" pout he gives me when I come from somewhere after a while! It's a half smile half pout!!! 

The way he eats his toes!!  

The way his eyes light up when we play lenka for him... He loves her!!!

How he alreadynot only knows his toy box... But hits it and pushes it till the lid comes off and then up turns it so all his toys come out... At six months mind you... 

Half a year I have had this little tiny being with me... And in that much he has seriously changed my life!! 

He has made me push so many of my boundaries and limits... He has made me feel a love that is so intense, so deep and so so magical I never knew I could feel it... And this after having some pretty intense and deep love for Aadi... But the depths with bumling... That's just another level all together......


Monday 2 September 2013

Being unwell :(

The last few days have been extremely difficult for me to write... 

I've started work... But the reason things have been difficult isn't because I don't have the time... It's because of the emotional roller coaster I have found myself on. 

So deciding to work in itself was a process and a half. I always knew I would want to work post the baby... But I hadn't thought about how soon I would want to get back. 

Not negatively, but Jaipur being a slightly slower town, I always had a lot of time on my hands here, even post the baby with so much support from home, I seemed to have enough time to do things. So rather than just blogging (!!!!!) I decided that Sid being six months was a good age for me to start. 

I know mums who started work when their bumlings were just three months old, so six months was easy for me to convince myself!! 

So I started off in great spirits all positive and looking forward to some good ol' hard work... Aadi and I lined up a bunch of meetings with people, Mom and Dad were only too happy to have bumling to themselves!! 

And bam!

Fever.. 99... 100....101... 

Cranky restless and all in all irritated... He wouldn't stay with anyone, wanted me to feed him, would stop crying only when I took him in my arms...

Now while these are great emotional boosters for a new mom... It can be quite another emotional downer for someone who is working... 

And not because being with him was taking up my work time, nope it was just mentally exhausting... 

Not only did I have an event planned for which I had to personally call fifty women I had to handmake thirty cards, but I was just so so so worried about Sid. 

First illnesses are always stressful I'm sure. Seeing your baby, your little life, not smiling but being all grumpy and pouty is tough. 

We took him to his doc, got some medicines. The fever went down for a day and a half, everyone was relieved, and then it came back with a vengeance. 

Our usual peadiatrician was out, we called every other doctor we knew. They all said to wait it out. But how....? 

Also, while he had started sleeping thru the night these days,now he was waking up often and that too slightly cranky... Oh God!! 

When we finally saw another doctor, who turned out to be aadis's peadiatrician, he told us to take a test for dengue.

That was it.... That blood test was just the worst thing in the world. Sid had knocked off just before they got the needle, and I tried waking him before they could prick up, but you know how these guys are... They are pricking ten people every twenty minutes, they had no time to be concerned... 

I damn near cried hearing him wail... Poor Aadi, I think he was about to punch the guy with the needle after a point...

The test was negative,but it was seriously the most difficult five days I have been thru. 

I know virals are in the air, fevers come and go.. Colds and coughs are common... But when you're little tiny lifeline has it.. It becomes an end of the world drama!!! 

Ha ha!! 

He's better now...he got better literally the day after the test!!! The funniest would be that he would be super cranky at home, but in front of the doctors he kept smiling and laughing... I'm sure the docs thought Aadi and I were one of those super paranoid parents!! 

But I guess all new parents are super paranoid right?